What I want to become in the future. How to choose the right future profession to your liking if you don’t know what you want to be

Hello, my name is Ramil. My problem is this.. I can’t understand myself, I can’t understand what I want in life and who I want to be. I don't have a specific dream. Yes, I want to be a successful person, but I don’t know who to be and in what area. It scares me, it depresses me. I am constantly haunted by some kind of apathy. Laziness is getting the better of me. It seems that I am slowly wasting away. I’m currently studying to become a programmer, already in my second year. I understand that this is not my thing, I don’t have a soul for this specialty. I only took up this specialty on the advice of my parents when they said it was in demand. Well, what should I do, because I myself don’t know what I want. Of course I listened to my parents. I seem to be a strong-willed guy, confident and don’t like to complain, but this moment scares me. I'm afraid for my future. Time, like water, is fleeting. Therefore, some measures must be taken. Tell me what to do, how to find myself, understand myself. Otherwise I'll go crazy... :(
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Ramil, age: 19 / 06/05/2014

Ramil! Work is often not similar to study, i.e., it is when a person works that he will begin to succeed in something, he can get a taste for it. Whether it’s yours or not, it’s probably wise to get a profession and work. If you make sure that it is not your second education, it is easier to get or complete courses than to rush from one to another. But this is an opinion, in practice it’s different for everyone, think about it. As for successful, this is a cliche and not entirely successful. A person can be successful, but not happy. Or successful, but not decent. Or successful, but does not love his job at heart. There are no dreams and you don’t know what you want, but this is understandable; it’s difficult for a young person who has not experienced a profession from the inside to choose. With the exception of some professions and vocations, such as sports, in which the child has been involved since childhood, or art. But even in art there is a lot of routine, for example, an artist makes 100 copies to order. Therefore, do what you do conscientiously, get one good education, learn to do at least something well, then some other calling, if you find it, you will be able to master it, the more a person knows how to do, the more he can learn. You cannot waste away at 19, no matter what you do. Everything should work for you: if you like it, you enjoy it, if you don’t like it, you train your will, if it works out, you rejoice at success, if it doesn’t work out at all, you train to overcome difficulties. A man should not be fixated on being comfortable, comfortable, carefree, if he lives like this, he must find what to overcome himself, this forms a man’s character. And with a strong character, it doesn’t really matter what you do or even how successful you are: you are harmonious from the inside; and loved ones: wife, children with such peace and well-being.

Marfa, age: 35 / 06/07/2014

Boy, I was like that myself at 18. Familiar.
1. First of all, don’t even think about quitting your studies!
Especially if now you don’t really know what you want.
2. Play sports.
Kickboxing and ballroom dancing helped me. Moreover, I went to both sections at the same time. C. 16.00 - 18.00 - Dancing. From 19.00 - 20.30 - Kik.
3. You have to try. Act and look for your own.
I'm 24 now.
Result: Graduated as an engineer. I went to study to become a lawyer. I like it. That's what I work with. I can't imagine life without a barbell. I learned to play the button accordion. Hobbies include repairing old cars (although previously I didn’t think I had any interest in technology) and shooting with air guns. I plan to open a gym and then buy myself an apartment.
But, Ramil, I tried a lot (from origami to agricultural production) until I found my own.
Go for it!!!

Sergey, age: 24 / 06/17/2014

This is normal for your age. In principle, sooner or later a person asks this question throughout his life, at different levels of achievement and success. Try to combine your studies with your hobby, if you program, come up with something that you like and make a program related to your interests. If studying is not to your liking, visit a career guidance specialist (help in choosing a profession) and an independent person will help you determine your skills, and you will tell him everything your soul is singing about. Go to the army, there will be time to understand yourself, plus you will gain a lot of life experience and self-education. Then on your own. If you wish, choose what your soul is inclined to and unlearn. Life is a much more multifaceted thing, who said that you need to do everything according to a template and according to what your parents say... You need to create for yourself and look at all things more broadly. I wrote to you because I was in exactly the same situation, I only made the decision to change universities in my 1st year and everything worked out well!

Valery, age: 25 / 30.06.2014

I doubt that such problems are solved online, but I still want to see at least a couple of tips. My current life looks like some kind of hopeless dead end. I absolutely don’t know what to do next, how
way to go, and all because I don’t know what I want. A year ago I graduated from university, I majored in biology, and in my 5th year I started working at school, reading ecology and biology, work was not
I liked it, the salary was only enough for a light snack. She left after 8 months. In the laboratory they also pay ridiculous money, the work is boring to the point of nausea. You're probably wondering why I only
after 5 years of study you woke up? I don’t know, I used to really like it, practice and theory, maybe study and work are really different things. Now I’m seriously thinking about another specialty, but
For the life of me I don’t know what to choose, I’m in a stupor. I do not know what I want. I am very afraid that I will remain a nobody. I tried myself in journalism, wrote articles for the website, it worked out well, but almost again
for free. At the moment I work part-time in a club (I dance) I’ve been dancing since I was 17). My parents say that I rush from one extreme to another and waste my life. I'm sooooo scared of this, I don't want to be
a freeloader, I’m very afraid of remaining an unfulfilled person, a dummy, and at the same time I can’t understand myself at all, I read a lot and try to try something new, but nothing
helps, apathy and fear overcome me more and more. Please answer, what should I do?

Ira, age: 22 / 02/08/2015

It’s funny, I’ve been asking myself this question since I was 16 years old. I’m now 29, I’ve had a lot of jobs in different fields, I haven’t missed any proposed adventures! And still searching today
I will settle down again. Advice: be strong and know you are not alone!

Valery, age: 29 / 04/13/2015

Ramil and everyone who read his question and the guys’ answers. At 25, I am an engineer in one very, very large company, the salary is normal, but I don’t have a passion for work, and I’m still in
confusion. I support the advice of Sergei and Valeriev, I completely share them: I found an outlet in sports, and in the army I radically changed my views on life, but nevertheless, I’m still scratching my head about what
express yourself. Be sure to read relevant literature, because... only it, in a concentrated form, gives you information to think about and solve your question.

Alexey, age: 25 / 06/12/2015

I’m probably writing quite late, but the fact is that I’m in exactly the same situation (by the way, I’m also studying to become a programmer; it sucks) and I’m going to quit and re-enroll next year. I think I found it
something I like, but I'm not 100% sure. Friends say this is a brave act, but the unknown is scary. But it’s worth a try; So let’s go for it!

Nastya, age: 18 / 06.11.2015

If you don’t know who you want to be and what you can do in general, and you want to find your purpose, try to constantly change your professions, get a job every time
any job until you find the job you love and need, and if you haven’t found it, then stop and return to all previous professions and carefully think about what
you enjoyed doing the most. Thus, preferably study as many specialties as possible and then you will have a choice in some specific matter! This concerns
only for those who do not know who they are, but people who have a specific goal in life, they know what to do!

Bakty-Ulan, age: 17 / 01/15/2016

The same situation... only I study at a medical university and this greatly complicates everything for me, since medical school is serious, we're talking about about the health of people who come to me
will come
It's interesting to study a person, but I don't feel like it's mine
I'm already in my 3rd year, and I still don't know if I want to be a doctor.
I tried a lot of new things, but I still couldn’t decide what I liked, and this is very depressing.

owl, age: 19 / 18.01.2016

Same story, I can’t find myself, I want to talk to someone so they can give me advice or point me in the right direction. I'm at a dead end. After 9th grade I entered finance and
loan, I don’t even know why I did it, because I didn’t even study, but worked all this time, that’s how I’ve been helping my parents as a salesman in a store for 5 years, but there’s nothing new for myself
I find out, I try to read books on self-development and psychology, but I just can’t find myself. Who will I be, who am I anyway? all these thoughts kill, there is no clear goal, and no talents
there is no way to prove yourself in something. Help....?

Kanyshay, age: 20 / 01/20/2016

Indeed, there are many of us. This is the topic of choosing life and it is very important. You probably need to figure out what you really like, but you can like many things. But who said you have to choose something?
one? I really feel like it’s painful to give up some desires. And laziness is a sign that you don’t want to do it. Perhaps there are more important questions than this?
Yesterday I watched a film about a hockey player Legend 17, there was a moment where the hero was in a quarrel with a girl and the coach tells him, you’re not completely on the ice now, you’ve solved your problems and have to
play. Maybe everything is like in this case with hockey? Are there any problems or questions that are bothering you right now? I myself am in such a state now, although I feel pain, I don’t want to give up this business,
I like it, but I want to explore the world, solve my problems, maybe it’s not all about experience. And it happens that you don’t like a case so much that you don’t defend it.

Nastch, age: 21 / 05/08/2016

Nastya, there are some people here who can’t get in, but you’re about to quit.)

Sanya, age: 19 / 10/11/2016

I’m 26, I dropped out of my first university after three months of studying (finance and credit), I graduated from my second (management). Worked in banks (in sales, in collections), on construction sites, in finishing, on a drilling rig
GNB (machinist, location equipment operator, polyethylene pipe welder), worked as a dryer, then as a general cook in a restaurant, cook at corporate dinners, studied
programming in three different courses. I play the synthesizer, guitar, bass guitar, and write a little music. Doing sports.

BUT, I still can’t find my place in life, my profession, my hobbies. There are few jobs available anymore; there are refusals everywhere because there is no experience. They offer me a job as a cook for a pittance, as a bank clerk for
even smaller pennies. A manager's diploma can only be wiped clean.

Everything seems like complete crap... Thanks to his wife, he hasn’t gone crazy yet. It's good that your loved ones are alive and well.

Reconung, age: 26 / 11/12/2016

Julia, age: 19/23/11/2016

In any case, education comes first.
Then swimming and running, and a bicycle won’t hurt.
Music as a hobby, guitar or some other instrument.
Do not drink even light alcohol and do not smoke, in general, no drugs.
Well, communication with the right and reliable people.
More picky with girls. Parents' opinions are definitely important!
Through them (the higher mind or God, as you like) we are given advice
for further stay and action in this world and situations.
That's the trick.
And watch less crazy TV with stupid programs.
It shortens and destroys life, and destroys the psyche of the population.
Learn! And don't pay attention to the idiots!

Vladimir, age: 44 / 02/09/2017

I completely agree with Julia. I’m 22, before the army I did what I liked, when I came back from the army I do what I like, only over time interests change, people change, who surrounds you, you may not find it all your life
your calling, but spend your whole life doing what you like and be happy! Myself last years I’m trying to find one of the main areas of my activity; I mainly connect my life with technology (cars,
motorcycles) since childhood I really liked to drive fast, at the moment I’m getting into auto sports and everything connected with it, I’m studying in the 5th year of an automobile college (I’m graduating this year) regarding earnings: that’s what I
I like there is no income, just expenses, I make a living working for Sto, and I’m also involved in the real estate “business”. Of course, everyone has their own capabilities and desires, do not tolerate and do not deny yourself anything,
do what you want, work where you want (if possible, of course) and over time you will understand that you don’t have to do one thing all your life, the main thing is to enjoy every job, because
happiness is a feeling and state of complete, highest satisfaction.

Igor Sergeevich, age: 22 / 05/14/2017

Same situation! I’m just leaning towards becoming a programmer (is this really so boring? :c). There are so many interesting answers here. All my life I’ve been thinking about choosing a profession and I can’t understand who I want to be and who I am.
principle. True, I’m still quite small compared to you. However, I'm glad I'm not alone.

Rob, age: 14 / 09/01/2017

Books! I try to read as much as possible. Books inspire. After every book I read, I feel renewed. You need to try yourself everywhere until you find what you have been looking for for so long. If you have a hobby,
try to make it a profession (if possible). I constantly think about what I want and what I’m doing, whether it’s really mine. And so far, yes. It is important! Do what you really like.

SG, age: 16/28/12/2017

Hi all. I studied to become a programmer and realized that it was not for me. Currently on maternity leave. But the question of who to be in life plagues me. I think, I think. It seems like I find something, but I’m afraid to try and then make a mistake. I understand that without trying, you won’t know. During maternity leave, I completely broke down and became a loner. New acquaintances are difficult for me. But I try to hold on and get out of this state.

Anya, age: 22 / 03/08/2018

Hello, my parents are forcing me to practice the accordion, they already say sit down and practice often, because they are musicians, but this irritates me terribly. How many tears I shed and how many quarrels there were, I don’t even remember now, since it started in the 6th grade. After a certain quarrel, I pull myself together, try to force myself, but to no avail. Mom says that mathematics, chemistry, physics are not my thing. I agree with her. What should I do?. I will be grateful for every word

Today, understanding who you want to be, setting goals for yourself and moving towards them is not so easy. Due to the fact that society develops every year, and new specialties and professions appear, which are also interesting, it is difficult to set a specific goal for yourself. Young people who just want to enter a university or have already entered and are thinking of changing directions are at the very beginning of their life journey and the most important thing here is not to make mistakes. If you want to do something that does not require a higher education, you don’t need to leave your university; the education you receive will be like a safety cushion in case your adventure doesn’t work out. When choosing a future profession, you only need to listen to yourself, because you will be doing this for the rest of your life.

If you enjoy doing something, do it professionally.

Many are now in search of themselves, even though they are educated and have work experience behind them. There are people who prefer to go with the flow, and there are those who can dramatically change their lives by quitting their jobs and going free.

“You can get everything you need, as long as you really need it.”

Ray Bradbury

Most normal people want to be healthy, smart, beautiful, successful people. Have you ever noticed that when you congratulate people on a holiday, you wish them what you yourself would like to receive first. So, you already know what you want, all you have to do is figure out how to achieve these goals.

Naturally, the path to achieving goals is different for everyone, but how can you choose your own path, the road that will lead you to your goals as comfortably and quickly as possible?

To find your path, you need to start walking. If you are working and just thinking about what you need to do to start moving towards your goals, you have already thought of everything and you need some kind of event to “set off on your journey.” With such reasoning, you are unlikely to move at all. It is clear that it is very difficult to leave your comfort zone, where everything is clear, but we only have one life. And you predetermine your future now, in the present. So maybe it’s worth taking a risk and “going”?

Most likely, you are rightly worried, and vain hopes, disappointments and resentments will await you at some point on your path to your goal, but if you don’t try, you won’t know. You may meet people who will betray you, as well as people who will become your reliable partners in life.

Fear of making mistakes

It is very difficult to take the first step, because if you make a mistake, then everything can go wrong. And often, people never do it and are left to go with the flow. We don't think this is a bad position, but if you want to control your destiny and get what you want, then this position is clearly not for you.

This position applies to people with low self-esteem who do not believe in themselves and their abilities. The fear of making a mistake so constrains both the brain and the body that a person actually becomes unable to think and act adequately and, naturally, commits it, which further reduces his self-esteem.

People with normal self-esteem say: “He who does nothing makes no mistakes” and are not afraid to try themselves different types activities and choose which ones suit them best.

In order to understand where to go and what to do, you need to not be afraid to make a mistake.

There is always a risk, but the risk can be justified and calculated.

If you have a hobby or some idea for a business, you can implement it without quitting your main job, but simply do it during your vacation. And if you have enough time to understand that it’s worth it, then after your vacation you can quit and continue doing what you love, otherwise you’ll just go back to work, but at least you’ll try and now you’ll think about how to improve your current idea or you will think about a new one.

To have the opportunity to choose, you need to expand your circle of interests and acquaintances. Simply put, a choice can only be made when there is plenty to choose from.

Life does not stand still - with the development of modern technologies, new opportunities open up before us, which means it becomes easier to make a choice. In addition, with age, we ourselves change, including our ideas about life values.

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Test “Who will I become in the future?”

For each point, choose one of the two statements that is closer to you:

1. a) I like to visit different places and travel.
b) I don’t like to go to different places and travel.

2. a) I like to walk in the rain.
b) When it rains outside, I prefer to stay at home.

3. a) I like to play with animals.
b) I don't like playing with animals.

4. a) I would like to become a participant in an interesting adventure.
b) The very possibility of any adventure scares me.

5. a) I would like everyone’s wishes to come true.
b) I understand that all people’s wishes cannot be fulfilled.

6. a) I don't like driving fast.
b) I like to drive fast.

7. a) When I grow up, I wouldn’t want to become a boss.
b) When I grow up, I dream of becoming a boss.

8. a) I don't like arguing with others.
b) I'm not afraid to argue, because it can be very interesting.

9. a) Sometimes I don’t understand adults.
b) I always understand adults.

10. a) I wouldn’t like to end up in a fairy tale.
b) I would like to get into a fairy tale.

11. a) I would like my life to be fun.
b) I would like my life to be calm.

12. a) I slowly enter cold water when I swim in the sea or river.
b) I try to jump into cold water as quickly as possible.

13. a) I don't really like music.
b) I really love music.

14. a) I think that being ill-mannered and rude is bad.
b) I think it’s bad to be a boring and boring person.

15. a) I love cheerful people.
b) I like calm people.

16. a) I would be scared to fly on a hang glider or jump with a parachute.
b) I would love to try hang gliding or skydiving.

Points for answers: